Therapy can often be helpful for changing negative thoughts, but you can also learn how to change your thought patterns. Changing your thinking will take some time. You need to practice thought-stopping every day. After a while, you'll be able to stop unwanted thoughts right. Why can't I stop thinking about things I can't change? And why when I force myself not to think about it and succeed I end up having anxiety because of it? Your brain will revert back to those unpleasant thoughts in about two seconds. You have to be proactive about changing the channel in your brain. Continue this practice of labeling, without attempting to soften, change, or avoid whatever thoughts you happen to be having. See if you can. If people can change, does that mean that they're changeable? Can you change someone? If you've ever been in an unhappy relationship, these. Sometimes we can't stop thinking about things that bother us. the thoughts out of your head and you can't stop thinking about them, change the thought. Distraction can also come in handy when you can't do anything to change the circumstances troubling you. It shouldn't replace acceptance and. You also don't want to spend your relationship trying to change your boyfriend and the way he feels. We are only in control of our own thoughts. Can't Stop Thinking reminds us that, as we learn to meet our mental stories with a patient, —Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Change.